I hate change

Hi everyone. This is a random entry that has nothing to do with real life, only with like my brain and subconscious and stuff, and those things like to worry, a lot. Probably too much, but I can't help it.

So, I have friends. At this point, they feel like stable friends. But, one of them said something the other day that worried the fuck out of me: Your friends change.

As in you have some friends sometimes, and then they go off and be friends with other people. This actually happens, I've seen it happen with my sister. She was BEST FRIENDS with this girl Lisa, and then around the end of her junior year, they just stopped. It was because my sister started hanging out with some people who Lisa didn't like. The fact that Jessie chose them over her kind of makes me wonder some things. If best friends can just chose people who new people over their best friends, it just makes me worry. What if my friends do this to me?

I don't want this to happen to me. This can't happen to me. I don't want my friends to go. I had so much trouble making friends, and I don't think I could do it again. I'm already seeing it start to happen now. New people are becoming friends with our group and I'm starting to feel like "What am I doing here?" No one there shares any of my main interests and it's all weird and such. I miss last year, like a lot. Most likely, by the end of the year, things will be a lot different. Then, by senior year, my friends will most likely be entirely different people...if I have any at all. I don't want them to stop being my friends, but apparently these things happen. But, I don't want it to happen to me.


Sorry if this made no sense. I don't think I conveyed what I was thinking very well. Sorry. But I hate change, just get that. Merrrhhhh


I end with this:

Friends

What r u doing

Friends

Stahp